Lonely

I adore being alone. I crave it, I love it, I look forward to it.

Being alone is something I absolutely need. As an example, for reasons I will never understand, I am completely unable to scrapbook unless I am the only person in the house... which may explain my annual page production.

The Empty House. The quiet, the peace, the idea that nothing occurs unless I want it to. I am a very solitary person and need these interludes to recharge my batteries. Dear God, just leave me ALONE.

And then there are the rare nights like tonight, nights when I am so bone-achingly lonely I can't stand it. I haven't "seen" Mario in quite a while, due to my work schedule, which, between both jobs, keep me out of the house from 8:00 am to midnight; and his schedule,which often sees him strolling in our door at 2:00 am.

I want my man. I want to see him, talk to him, look at hockey if I must, make love, eat dinner, fold laundry together, play backgammon, feel his hand on my hip as we drift to sleep, plan our garden, listen to his army stories, make love, play with our pets, argue over the roast, hear the electrical buzz of him trimming his beard, make love.

I am lonely tonight.